“Relaxation and Happiness”
Audible Blog
When we were very little, my brother and I would curl up under a blanket, one at each end of the sofa, for afternoon ‘rest time’. There we would lie, quietly transfixed by the cosy glow of the gas fire, with the soaring strings of ‘Manuel and the Music of the Mountains’ washing over us. Not only has it stood the test of time as a much cherished childhood memory, but it also stands out as quite a potent early experience of relaxation and happiness.
Manuel & the Music of the Mountains – Malaguena (1964)
Manuel & The Music of the Mountains – The Shadow Of Your Smile (1965)
Fast forward about 40 years, and here I am lying under a blanket on a yoga mat, at the end of my weekly class at the Tara Yoga Centre. It’s relaxation time: the lights are dimmed, the music is soothing and – you know what? – I’m happy.
Tara Yoga Centre
Tara is a charitable organisation offering traditional teachings, classes and workshops in Yoga, Tantra and Spirituality. I’m nearly two months into my first year there and this is just one of many things that have struck a chord with me: this link between relaxation and happiness.
Energy can only flow freely through a relaxed structure.
The state of happiness and the state of relaxation are deeply connected to one another. Once one of these states is reached, the other one will naturally follow.
Where there is no relaxation, there is no happiness.
Relaxation must be practised gradually, as a distinct technique in the beginning, until the state of profound relaxation becomes second nature.
The aim, when deepening relaxation, is to completely release tension in all muscles; to experience the intimate attuning of your vital being with the energies of the Universe and to increase the state of harmony in your entire being.
Practising relaxation, you will spontaneously begin to radiate calmness, peace and harmony around you.
(Tara Yoga Centre: Tantra Course, ATMAN Federation – reproduced with permission)
Relaxation and happiness
It’s not the first time I’ve experienced this kind of conscious relaxation – where each body part is relaxed in turn, from the toes to the top of the head – or the profound sense of well-being it can bring. I just haven’t practised or prioritised it. I’ve been doing yoga at home for about 20 years now but have always skipped that final relaxation part. Perhaps because it seemed rather passive or superfluous – the exercise is the important bit, right?
Like many people, I’m sure, I’ve spent much more of my time focused on doing than on being.
But does doing make us happy?
Happiness in doing or having
There is a joy, a sense of satisfaction or even elation, that comes from achieving things in life and this is often well-earned. But that happiness is often short-lived, attached as it is to the thing that has given us the joy. The thing passes, so does the happiness and we are onto the next thing.
The same can be said of our possessions. How many of these continue to give us the same pleasure – day in, day out – as on the day we got them? The novelty wears off soon enough. This kind of happiness is conditional. It comes and then it goes.
I saw this once written as an equation: Me + ? = Happiness
The ‘?’ could be anything from a career change, new relationship, holiday in the sun … to weight loss, a face lift, clearing debts, having a baby or getting a divorce! But is there another route to happiness, perhaps more accessible and reliable than through doing or having?
Happiness in being
Human beings have always sought happiness in a variety of different places, people and things – but it’s worth being reminded now and again that this happiness resides within us, as a core emotion and essential part of our being.
Conscious relaxation is a wonderful way to connect with our inner reserves of happiness because the practice directly addresses the very thing that most often stands in our way – tension. Tension is antithetical to happiness and well-being. Check back with your own experience. Or think of people you know who are ‘uptight’, ‘wound up’ or ‘highly-strung’ – do they seem happy to you?
Relaxation with awareness
It’s important to remember that the practice of relaxation is not only about releasing tension. Once these tensions are melted away, this deeply relaxed but aware state becomes a gateway to higher states of consciousness and connection. What I’m learning at Tara Yoga is that this relaxation with awareness is absolutely what we are aiming for.
Not only does it increase our sense of happiness and well-being, it also enhances our experience of connection, intimacy and pleasure. If we think of the opposites of ‘relaxation’ and ‘awareness’ as being ‘tension’ and ‘distraction’ – it’s not hard to imagine the difference this can make.
In closing
And so I am now practising and prioritising relaxation more – but this time without the 1970s soft furnishings or my Mum’s choice of music! And while ‘Manuel and the Music of the Mountains’ will always hold a very special place in my heart, it is not generally my first choice ; )
Below I have shared three favourite ambient tracks that I use in my practice, as well as a few suggested guided relaxation videos. There are many more on YouTube. Please do share your own favourite relaxation tracks and exercises in the comments below.
Happy relaxing! : )
Guided relaxations:
How to do Progressive Muscle Relaxation – THERAPIST AID (6.5 mins)
Yoga Nidra: Total Deep Relaxation – NICK EBERLE (20 mins)
My favourite ambient tracks for relaxation and meditation:
2 Hours Chillout in the Forest, Relax in Nature, Meditation, Binatural beats – ZEN SCAPES
Beautiful Ambient Space Music | Part 3 – ANDREW RADER
QUESTION: To what extent do you allow yourself to fully relax and do you see any correlation between that and your general levels of happiness?
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7 Comments
Natasha
Loved this post… really nice links and hearing the magic of your smile brought back similar cosy childhood memories!
Tracy Starreveld
Thanks for your lovely comment, Natasha.
Glad it brought back nice memories : )
Janey
I love that you have an audio blog. And your voice is so soothing and… relaxing! 😊 Great post!! My favourite form of relaxation is exercising, yoga and meditation.
Tracy Starreveld
Hi Janey
Thanks for the lovely feedback!
Exercise, yoga AND meditation – wow, keep up the good work 🙂
Tracy.
Letizia Bartoloni
Such a beautiful article. I agree!!
Happiness in being :)!
Thanks for the music tracks, great idea 😊.
Tracy Starreveld
My pleasure, Letizia : )
Thanks for the lovely comment.
Tracy.
Three Links
Good information has been given. Thanks for posting it.